[ she shrinks back when saber pulls his hand from her, her hands held together against her chest so tightly that she can feel her nails pressing into her skin. her heart pounds with fear; she shouldn't have said this. she should have kept her mouth shut and kept it to herself, just like how it seems that she'll be keeping these murders for the rest of her life.
ashamed of her mistake, she hangs her head, staring at a blank space on the couch between them. ]
I didn't want to turn a blind eye to who you are. If I only knew one side of you and ignored the rest then... then what kind of Master... no, what kind of person would I be? [ though that gets her to laugh bitterly. she's no good as either, it seems. ] So I saw it. And it really was one of the worst things I've ever seen but...
[ but... ]
It hasn't stopped me. From wanting to be your Master. Or from wanting to make your wish come true. Because you're more than just that to me. You're a headstrong, stubborn, and fearless idiot, but you've been nothing but kind to me, caring for me this whole time, even when I was rude to you and pushed you away. You've saved my life so many times that I don't think I could ever repay you for it. And your wish is... it's beautiful, Saber. I can't imagine a more beautiful wish to see fulfilled by the Grail.
[ and that's why it hurts to know that she can't be the one to fulfill it. as she is now, it's fine, since she has no powers and no way to corrode saber's values, but imagining how different things could be is enough to turn her blood to ice. ]
no subject
[ she shrinks back when saber pulls his hand from her, her hands held together against her chest so tightly that she can feel her nails pressing into her skin. her heart pounds with fear; she shouldn't have said this. she should have kept her mouth shut and kept it to herself, just like how it seems that she'll be keeping these murders for the rest of her life.
ashamed of her mistake, she hangs her head, staring at a blank space on the couch between them. ]
I didn't want to turn a blind eye to who you are. If I only knew one side of you and ignored the rest then... then what kind of Master... no, what kind of person would I be? [ though that gets her to laugh bitterly. she's no good as either, it seems. ] So I saw it. And it really was one of the worst things I've ever seen but...
[ but... ]
It hasn't stopped me. From wanting to be your Master. Or from wanting to make your wish come true. Because you're more than just that to me. You're a headstrong, stubborn, and fearless idiot, but you've been nothing but kind to me, caring for me this whole time, even when I was rude to you and pushed you away. You've saved my life so many times that I don't think I could ever repay you for it. And your wish is... it's beautiful, Saber. I can't imagine a more beautiful wish to see fulfilled by the Grail.
[ and that's why it hurts to know that she can't be the one to fulfill it. as she is now, it's fine, since she has no powers and no way to corrode saber's values, but imagining how different things could be is enough to turn her blood to ice. ]
I'm sorry. If you'd like me to leave, I will.