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[ He shakes his head. ]
Not at all. The most that I noticed was the vast amount of magical energy you were able to give me, but... not much otherwise.
[ And even then, he had been reticent to take more than he needed to try and take as less energy has he could from her as possible, so... ]
Not at all. The most that I noticed was the vast amount of magical energy you were able to give me, but... not much otherwise.
[ And even then, he had been reticent to take more than he needed to try and take as less energy has he could from her as possible, so... ]
You didn't? Really?
[ there's a flash of emotion across ayaka's face. surprise, followed by relief, and ultimately confusion. ]
I guess the thing is that... when I'm around people they... I don't know how to describe it. [ she shakes her head. ] I guess the best way to put it is that they go crazy. I'm...not that different from Ish...or from what I've heard about the Holy Grail. I grant wishes but, they never bring anyone happiness. It just drives them insane until eventually they destroy themselves.
[ what would she call it? greed? ayaka can't help but see herself as a sort of bad omen, a creature that amplifies people's greed until they self-destruct. so what does it mean, if saber's never felt himself affected by it? or is her innate trait just that imperceptible? ]
So I thought that, if I were around... I would end up ruining your wish. I'm scared of that, you know. I know you said that you're not a good person but for that reason, I don't want to dirty something so beautiful!
[ there's a flash of emotion across ayaka's face. surprise, followed by relief, and ultimately confusion. ]
I guess the thing is that... when I'm around people they... I don't know how to describe it. [ she shakes her head. ] I guess the best way to put it is that they go crazy. I'm...not that different from Ish...or from what I've heard about the Holy Grail. I grant wishes but, they never bring anyone happiness. It just drives them insane until eventually they destroy themselves.
[ what would she call it? greed? ayaka can't help but see herself as a sort of bad omen, a creature that amplifies people's greed until they self-destruct. so what does it mean, if saber's never felt himself affected by it? or is her innate trait just that imperceptible? ]
So I thought that, if I were around... I would end up ruining your wish. I'm scared of that, you know. I know you said that you're not a good person but for that reason, I don't want to dirty something so beautiful!
[ Richard's eyes flicker somewhat at the mention of Ish, but otherwise he's fairly steady as Ayaka explains it to him. Could she be affecting him without her knowing? It's possible, but he would've thought that someone in his retinue would have said something by now, and after all their time together...
The worry in his expression fades, that easy smile back on his lips again. ] I assure you, Ayaka, if you've affected me at all up until this point, I haven't been able to tell. Besides, I'm the same as I've ever been during our time here, right?
[ He pokes himself in the cheek a few times, like he's testing the elasticity of his skin. ]
If I had lost myself by now, I'm sure you probably would've been able to tell and put my head back on straight.
[ For all the greed and rage he has simmering under his skin at all times, wouldn't she have had made things worse by now if it was affecting him? Perhaps whatever loyalties to the knight class that's been encoded in him as being summoned as a Saber is enough to resist it? He's got no clue. ]
So I don't see any reason why that you could ever ruin it. I told you – without you, I wouldn't have even come to that realization of what I wanted it to be after so long. You could never dirty it.
The worry in his expression fades, that easy smile back on his lips again. ] I assure you, Ayaka, if you've affected me at all up until this point, I haven't been able to tell. Besides, I'm the same as I've ever been during our time here, right?
[ He pokes himself in the cheek a few times, like he's testing the elasticity of his skin. ]
If I had lost myself by now, I'm sure you probably would've been able to tell and put my head back on straight.
[ For all the greed and rage he has simmering under his skin at all times, wouldn't she have had made things worse by now if it was affecting him? Perhaps whatever loyalties to the knight class that's been encoded in him as being summoned as a Saber is enough to resist it? He's got no clue. ]
So I don't see any reason why that you could ever ruin it. I told you – without you, I wouldn't have even come to that realization of what I wanted it to be after so long. You could never dirty it.
I see. I was worried about nothing this whole time, then?
[ nothing to saber, at least. to ayaka, it was almost everything. it felt like she had been deceiving saber, leading him on and towards disaster without neither of them being aware about it. and yet here he is, proudly saying that ayaka could never ruin his wish with that same easy-going smile as ever.
that's right... he hadn't changed one bit from their time in snowfield, had he? he was still the same person that had so stupidly saved her in the opera house and got her arrested.
feeling the sting of tears in her eyes again, she takes off her glasses and sets them aside so that she can properly rub her eyes. this time, however, they're tears of relief. ]
I'm glad, then. I-- I didn't... I didn't want to let you go. I thought I had to but I didn't want to. So I'm glad.
[ glad that she can stay with saber to watch him fulfill his wish. glad that she's not affecting him. and, perhaps, glad that she can be just a little selfish sometimes.
taking a leap of faith, ayaka leans forward to wrap her arms behind richard's neck and pull him into a hug. ]
[ nothing to saber, at least. to ayaka, it was almost everything. it felt like she had been deceiving saber, leading him on and towards disaster without neither of them being aware about it. and yet here he is, proudly saying that ayaka could never ruin his wish with that same easy-going smile as ever.
that's right... he hadn't changed one bit from their time in snowfield, had he? he was still the same person that had so stupidly saved her in the opera house and got her arrested.
feeling the sting of tears in her eyes again, she takes off her glasses and sets them aside so that she can properly rub her eyes. this time, however, they're tears of relief. ]
I'm glad, then. I-- I didn't... I didn't want to let you go. I thought I had to but I didn't want to. So I'm glad.
[ glad that she can stay with saber to watch him fulfill his wish. glad that she's not affecting him. and, perhaps, glad that she can be just a little selfish sometimes.
taking a leap of faith, ayaka leans forward to wrap her arms behind richard's neck and pull him into a hug. ]
[ Once Ayaka's settled back in the Primrose suite, having gotten her shoulder fixed, Richard's sitting at the end of the bed she's been using since she moved over. The energy that's seeping out of him is kind of charged, if not a little rancid, after everything that happened. It's hard to have anticipated it all, but this...
He glances the shoulder where Siffrin was embedded in not that long ago for a few beats, before back up at her. ]
How is it feeling?
He glances the shoulder where Siffrin was embedded in not that long ago for a few beats, before back up at her. ]
How is it feeling?
Edited 2025-04-02 03:18 (UTC)
Fine.
[ ayaka can feel the charged energy in the room, and she doesn’t like it in the slightest. the shoulder still aches, despite it being healed, though she’s not sure if that’s psychosomatic or real.
she can’t look at richard in the eyes, however, and her gaze is fixed on the hands on her lap.
ayaka doesn’t bother asking how richard is doing. at this point she doesn’t need a master’s link to have a pretty decent idea of his state of mind. ]
Guess everyone knows now.
[ ayaka can feel the charged energy in the room, and she doesn’t like it in the slightest. the shoulder still aches, despite it being healed, though she’s not sure if that’s psychosomatic or real.
she can’t look at richard in the eyes, however, and her gaze is fixed on the hands on her lap.
ayaka doesn’t bother asking how richard is doing. at this point she doesn’t need a master’s link to have a pretty decent idea of his state of mind. ]
Guess everyone knows now.
[ He tenses up as Ayaka wraps her arms around him, stiffly letting himself be pulled in but otherwise as his brain does a full-on reset. ]
A-Ayaka –
[ It takes a good few beats for him to regain his faculties, blinking a few times. He does eventually return the gesture, though, pulling her closer as he wraps his arms around her.
He chuckles shakily at that, trying to will his ears to stop being red. ] You always worry about the silliest things.
[ Even if she was somehow corrupting him, truth be told, he's not completely sure he'd mind that much. It's not like he's ever really stopped himself from being so selfish, after all. If he was dragged down with her as a result, then so be it. ]
A-Ayaka –
[ It takes a good few beats for him to regain his faculties, blinking a few times. He does eventually return the gesture, though, pulling her closer as he wraps his arms around her.
He chuckles shakily at that, trying to will his ears to stop being red. ] You always worry about the silliest things.
[ Even if she was somehow corrupting him, truth be told, he's not completely sure he'd mind that much. It's not like he's ever really stopped himself from being so selfish, after all. If he was dragged down with her as a result, then so be it. ]
Ah--
[ as saber pulls her close, she realizes just exactly what she had done. thank whatever deity is above that in this position saber can't see the red on her face and that her hair covers her ears.
but she doesn't pull away. instead, she buries her face in saber's shoulder, groaning in embarrassment. ]
Ugh, I'm sorry. I...didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.
[ after all of this, the last thing she needs to be doing is causing more trouble for saber. ]
[ as saber pulls her close, she realizes just exactly what she had done. thank whatever deity is above that in this position saber can't see the red on her face and that her hair covers her ears.
but she doesn't pull away. instead, she buries her face in saber's shoulder, groaning in embarrassment. ]
Ugh, I'm sorry. I...didn't mean to make you uncomfortable.
[ after all of this, the last thing she needs to be doing is causing more trouble for saber. ]
...
[ Richard exhales through his nose, looking away from her as he eyes a relatively unremarkable part of crown molding near the ceiling. Whether he actually believes it not doesn't really matter right now, and... it's not really about him at the moment, anyway. ]
I suppose it could've gone worse. [ though, like. this is still very bad, for him. ] I should've stepped in sooner.
[ Richard exhales through his nose, looking away from her as he eyes a relatively unremarkable part of crown molding near the ceiling. Whether he actually believes it not doesn't really matter right now, and... it's not really about him at the moment, anyway. ]
I suppose it could've gone worse. [ though, like. this is still very bad, for him. ] I should've stepped in sooner.
Would that have changed anything?
[ ayaka doesn't think so. siffrin was angry, siobhan was angry...if richard had stepped in sooner, the powder keg would have simply exploded sooner than it did.
ayaka sighs, staring fixedly at her nails. ]
I'm not sorry for what I did. [ though she didn't necessarily enjoy getting stabbed. ] But I am sorry for worrying you.
[ and she is angry at herself for essentially playing into siffrin's hand. ]
[ ayaka doesn't think so. siffrin was angry, siobhan was angry...if richard had stepped in sooner, the powder keg would have simply exploded sooner than it did.
ayaka sighs, staring fixedly at her nails. ]
I'm not sorry for what I did. [ though she didn't necessarily enjoy getting stabbed. ] But I am sorry for worrying you.
[ and she is angry at herself for essentially playing into siffrin's hand. ]
Edited 2025-04-03 09:19 (UTC)
I wonder where the others will be…
[ she slides down against the wall, watching saber try and fail to open the door. ]
If it all goes well, we’ll be back in Snowfield soon, huh?
[ she slides down against the wall, watching saber try and fail to open the door. ]
If it all goes well, we’ll be back in Snowfield soon, huh?
[ ...... the lack of an answer to her question seems to be one in of itself. No, he guesses it wouldn't have changed anything – or, like he said, it could've been worse. Perhaps he would've just messed things up, just like...
His shoulders sag a little bit, and he sighs. ] You didn't have to do that, Ayaka. I would've been able to...
[ His voice trails off, like he's lost the train of thought. He knows she knows he can take that. But it's not the point, as much as he wants it to be. ]
They were still targeting you. [ They could've done much, much worse than a stab to the shoulder. ]
His shoulders sag a little bit, and he sighs. ] You didn't have to do that, Ayaka. I would've been able to...
[ His voice trails off, like he's lost the train of thought. He knows she knows he can take that. But it's not the point, as much as he wants it to be. ]
They were still targeting you. [ They could've done much, much worse than a stab to the shoulder. ]
Not sure. I know Dan Heng said he was going with Blade, but I didn't hear anything about specifics, from him or any of the others.
[ which is probably for the best. who knows what part of the château is being defiled with sin.
After a few more tries on the door, he sighs, moving to sit down next to her. ]
When all goes well. [ ... ] It's hard to believe that we've known each other longer here, come to think of it.
[ which is probably for the best. who knows what part of the château is being defiled with sin.
After a few more tries on the door, he sighs, moving to sit down next to her. ]
When all goes well. [ ... ] It's hard to believe that we've known each other longer here, come to think of it.
Ah....you're right, huh? We've remembered about a month?
[ and who knows how much more time this has gone on for. she turns towards him, considering all the time that they've spent together. ]
I guess I never really noticed. It's not like you've changed a lot.
[ and who knows how much more time this has gone on for. she turns towards him, considering all the time that they've spent together. ]
I guess I never really noticed. It's not like you've changed a lot.
I know that!
[ suddenly raising her voice, ayaka feels the anxiety of earlier come over her like a shock of electricity. she knows now that they had been baiting her and she hates herself for falling for it. how could she be so naive?
she has no argument against him, however. she recognizes that she was terrified and that it clouded her judgement until it was too late. bringing her legs close, she leans her forehead against her knees, her hands to the sides of her head. frustrated, she groans. ]
I know. I did the exact thing that I get angry at you for.
[ suddenly raising her voice, ayaka feels the anxiety of earlier come over her like a shock of electricity. she knows now that they had been baiting her and she hates herself for falling for it. how could she be so naive?
she has no argument against him, however. she recognizes that she was terrified and that it clouded her judgement until it was too late. bringing her legs close, she leans her forehead against her knees, her hands to the sides of her head. frustrated, she groans. ]
I know. I did the exact thing that I get angry at you for.
Edited 2025-04-04 04:30 (UTC)
At least. Who knows how long it's truly been.
[ If he takes Ish at his word, then it shouldn't matter, but... ]
You're right, I really haven't, huh? [ he grins, taking it more like compliment than anything else ] But you have. You're certainly more Master-y, for starters.
[ If he takes Ish at his word, then it shouldn't matter, but... ]
You're right, I really haven't, huh? [ he grins, taking it more like compliment than anything else ] But you have. You're certainly more Master-y, for starters.
Huh?
[ ayaka freezes, looking up at richard like he's starting to grow a second head, but then looks away in a feeble attempt at seeming uninterested by the fact. ]
Really...I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.
[ ayaka freezes, looking up at richard like he's starting to grow a second head, but then looks away in a feeble attempt at seeming uninterested by the fact. ]
Really...I'm not sure if that's a good thing or a bad thing.
Stop it, I know you have a smug grin on your face right now.
[ she is looking away HARDER, with her arms crossed to boot.
all while also ignoring the way her ears turn red in embarrassment, but don’t pay attention to that. ]
I guess that if I’m more “Master-y”, then it’s probably because of all the stuff we’ve been through.
[ she doesn’t want to say it out loud, but she thinks the shared experiences have brought them far closer than she ever expected. ]
[ she is looking away HARDER, with her arms crossed to boot.
all while also ignoring the way her ears turn red in embarrassment, but don’t pay attention to that. ]
I guess that if I’m more “Master-y”, then it’s probably because of all the stuff we’ve been through.
[ she doesn’t want to say it out loud, but she thinks the shared experiences have brought them far closer than she ever expected. ]
Wow, you've got good perception, Ayaka. Are you sure you do not have eyes in the the back of your head? Should I be worried about being turned to stone?
[ He does not stop. He will continue until morale improves. ]
Adversity build character, does it not? You've come quite more into your own, over these past few weeks.
[ He does not stop. He will continue until morale improves. ]
Adversity build character, does it not? You've come quite more into your own, over these past few weeks.
You’re talking nonsense again…
[ but fine, she’ll turn back around to face him and his stupid smug grin.
though what he says is interesting. she’s coming into herself because of all that has happened? that can’t be quite right. she was the little fugitive that only knew how to run away from her problems. even before the suggestion magecraft had been placed on her, that had been all she knew how to do. so how could she possibily have such a big change?
…
her expression softens as she comes up with an answer. ]
I mean… if anything it’s probably thanks to, well, your support. I’ve leaned on you a lot this whole time so… thank you. For everything up until now.
[ but fine, she’ll turn back around to face him and his stupid smug grin.
though what he says is interesting. she’s coming into herself because of all that has happened? that can’t be quite right. she was the little fugitive that only knew how to run away from her problems. even before the suggestion magecraft had been placed on her, that had been all she knew how to do. so how could she possibily have such a big change?
…
her expression softens as she comes up with an answer. ]
I mean… if anything it’s probably thanks to, well, your support. I’ve leaned on you a lot this whole time so… thank you. For everything up until now.
[ kill him, Ayaka. kill him now. ]
I've done nothing to be grateful for.
[ The grin softens into something appreciative. ]
If anything, I should be the one thanking you. I do not think I would have lasted very long if not for your determination and resolve this whole time.
I've done nothing to be grateful for.
[ The grin softens into something appreciative. ]
If anything, I should be the one thanking you. I do not think I would have lasted very long if not for your determination and resolve this whole time.
Me?
[ ayaka blinks, surprised by the comment. she never has given herself much importance during her time here. she can’t imagine that she would be so important that saber would have trouble if she wasn’t here.
she brings her knees close, studying richard. she never thought that he would be selling himself low. ]
I don’t know, I feel like you’ve gotten along well with your roommates. If anything, sometimes I feel like I’m in the way.
[ he’s so protective of her, after all. if she weren’t around, would he not be more free to do as he wanted? ]
[ ayaka blinks, surprised by the comment. she never has given herself much importance during her time here. she can’t imagine that she would be so important that saber would have trouble if she wasn’t here.
she brings her knees close, studying richard. she never thought that he would be selling himself low. ]
I don’t know, I feel like you’ve gotten along well with your roommates. If anything, sometimes I feel like I’m in the way.
[ he’s so protective of her, after all. if she weren’t around, would he not be more free to do as he wanted? ]
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